Yes…. I am sure.

I made the mistake of visiting Tescos today whilst shopping in Ealingtown. Well, you might say two mistakes, firstly entered the vile place, secondly I selected some non-alcoholic booze from the shelf, but I have a good reason for the second error… honest…

Anyhoo, I take said bottles to the till section and join the shortest queue, I wait until it’s my turn to pay whilst idly gazing about at other shoppers items, wondering what they might be creating with their soon to be purchased treats.

Nice looking till girl: Hello.
Happy shopper: Hi.
*beep*, *beep*, *tap tap tap*
Nice looking till girl: That will be £2.38 please.
Confused shopper: Err, no it won’t, that will be £1.90, they are 95p each.
Slightly brusque till girl: No, they are £1.19.
Quite annoyed shopper: Well it says 95p on the shelf.
Accusatorial till girl: No it doesn’t.
Astounded shopper: Umm, yes it does.
Flat out rude till girl: Are you lying?
Speechless shopper: …
Deathwish till girl: I’ll have to check, DAVE, man says these are 95p, can you check.

And let me know that he’s a thieving liar, she might as well have added. Some what flabbergasted I stood there waiting for Dave to do his thing, slightly annoyed at holding up the poor people behind but I did not have the loose change to pay the shocking new price and did not want to use a card for such a paltry sum of money. Even if I did, I hate to be ripped off by lying price stickers. Dave wanders back and, shock flaming horror, confirmed that I was indeed not a filthy lying thieving swine but indeed telling the truth. Who would have thought it.

Totally unapologetic till girl: Oh, how do I change it then.
Dave: *tap tap tap* right, rescan…
*beep*, *beep*
Soon to be killed till girl: That’s £1.90 then.
Apoplectic shopper: I told you they were 95p… might be nice if you apologised for calling me a liar… No, fine, here have your money you vile faced hag,

Now I realise that they are not just going to take my word for it that there are different prices on the shelves than the computer claims, but to ask if I’m lying… really… no… Even if I was lying what kind of imbecile criminal would I be if I just caved at the point of being asked “are you lying?”, “oh yes shucks you got me, I was trying to pull the wool over your eyes to save myself a massive 48p, I’ll take myself down the cop shop, no need to get up”.

To not even apologise at being so rude when it turns out your computer is not right, shocking, this is why I should stick to Waitrose, even when you clearly in the wrong and have misread the offer they profusely grovel to you for your own stupidity. Easily worth the extra 80% you pay…

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4 Responses to Yes…. I am sure.

  1. AndyH says:

    Talking of Tesco, they had a Christmas tree and ‘Meryy Christmas’ signs up this morning. Thw world is clearly doomed.

  2. AndyH says:

    And I can’t type.

  3. angela jackson says:

    i feel your rage

  4. Jon says:

    I had an interesting on e recently buying a few cartons of NCG soup, including a new variety – something along the lines of Thai Spicy Chicken. I go to the self service till, and begin scanning my soup except when i get to the Thai one it won’t scan. Dude comes over looks at it, does some jiggery pokery on the till and then turns to me and tells me I can’t buy it cos it’s not in the system. Thai spicy chiken soup – DENIED! “Computer” as the saying goes “says No” :(

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